"Life is all about managing your expectations," my brother always told me. Weird how many times I feel like I had to hear this...
Making things even more confusing: there's an entirely paradoxical narrative that advises us to stay positive and to get super clear about what we want out of life. Oh, and also that we're all kings and queens and we deserve nothing less than the best.
So how the frick are we supposed to expect if we're supposed to expect nothing and also everything?
If you're someone with expectations of only excellence, a naively overly-optimistic soul, or a control-freak with a basket of trust issues, my native tongue is yours. Let me help us all set this confusion straight so we can set ourselves free.
The Steps to Manage Your Expectations
1. Set Your Intentions.
How many articles have I written where setting intentions is step one? Someone tell me in the comments because I think it's an absurd number. It's not superfluous though. If you go out and do anything in the world without clear intention of why you're doing it and what kind of energy you're doing it with, you're likely to end up in way stickier situations than you intended to. Oh, you didn't intend for that? Set your intentions!
2. Have Trust.
This step is really where we dive into the key to the balancing act. In order to achieve trust, we must surrender control. Sweating already? Same. When we don't trust ourselves, others, the universe, etc., it's not easy to surrender control. If you're feeling guarded in this area, try tiny little tests to see if others, you, or the universe can pick up the slack you're so worried about not getting handled. Delegate a small task to a co-worker, ask a simple favor of a friend, take the first baby step doing something you're afraid of doing (even make a teeny switch in your normal routine), pray for a sign. Put the universe to the test until you get comfortable enough with its delivery. Trust.
Here's a mantra to guide you through it: "everything is the best possible outcome."
P.S. that's the candy of this entire write-up.
3. Look for Lessons.
With the steps taken up until after the event or situation you've been managing your mindset (expectations around), whatever turns out will surely be a lot more digestible. After it's all said and done, take a moment to reflect on your process (how you showed up and managed your mindset) and also what you learned. Even if nothing went as planned, why did this happen for you?
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