11 Midweek Musings

future self gifts letters Nov 22, 2023

Back on some old shii and some new shii. This week has been yet another mix up of self-care and these are my favorite ones...


1. Letting myself embrace the worst case.

I've been a fan of walking myself to the end of my fears/anxieties for a long time. It's a powerful practice. But I've recently adopted an edgy shift: embracing the worst case. Not spiraling on it, not ruminating on it, not believing it to be true, but getting to the point where I see it and feel PEACE about it. Because the truth is, even if the worst thing happened, you'd still be okay. Even if the worst thing happened, it'd be FOR you. A silly recent one for me was about so much of my hair falling out. It's gotten to the point where the ends are so straggly that I've been concerned I'll have to cut it short (an irrational huge fear of mine as my hair is a huge security blanket for me). Well, I let myself visualize it and feel into the fact that I'd ABSOLUTELY be okay no matter what. I even know what style I'd get if the worst case happened. I embraced it so I could just feel peace and that peace is what helps me manifest the outcome I ACTUALLY desire (which of course, is to ideally keep this long hair). You get me? Counter-intuitive, but BOOM.


2. In-person events.

My most profound memories are from hosting and attending in-person events. The collective energy from a shared intention creates miracles and magic. Humans heal in community. Even if we're traumatized introverts (hello, this was me!), this is our true nature. I hosted a breathwork event that reignited my soul so hard that I decided to host another one. Join me on 11/27 for my full moon breathwork + cacao ceremony on the beach in Dana Point, CA!


3. Buying gifts for people.

Gifts have always been the last of my love languages, but I feel them creeping up in significance. Maybe it's because 'tis the season, but I also think it's just becoming so much more meaningful to me that someone could spend time thinking of you, searching for something for you and spending their money and time on it for you. It's a physical snippet of their love you get to enjoy forever (or for however long you keep it around). Precious. As it's scorpio season and tons of my besties are scorpios (duh), I've been having so much fun buying them things that make me think of them.


4. Writing letters to people even if you don't send/give them.

 I did this for my mom and my partner with the full intent of giving both of them the letters. To my own surprise, I didn't need to. What I wrote to my mom manifested in real life, and what I wrote to my partner just poured out of me that night. It got my wheels turning, my clarity clarified, and my heart open for deepening conversation. I guess it's like writing that email with no subject line only this time, with love and intent.


5. Rain.

Warm rain is my favorite, but even cold rain every once in a while does something for me. It's connecting. It takes me out of my head and into nature. Between the sounds, the smells and the change in environment, it really seems to bring the outside in (in a good way). 


6. Doing two 20-minute workouts.

I don't know why this started happening, but I'm liking it a lot. Instead of doing one long workout, I've been doing two shorter ones. I usually do them back to back, which begs the question: why not just do one long one? But I find this is way more digestible and entertaining right now. I get two different types of workouts where I'm celebrated not once, but twice! It's like writing and then checking off those little mundane tasks on the to-do list just because it feels good. More reward, same effectivity. 


7. Doing something I'm excited to do FIRST thing in the morning.

I'm currently playing with replacing my morning meditation (if it feels authentic and truly more important) with an item on my to-do list or even a pleasurable activity that I'm excited about. The other day, it was designing a flyer for my upcoming event. I got to meditating later, but it started me off with the energy I wanted for the day, which honestly, is a 95% the reason I meditate in the morning to begin with. This permission to get creative has felt challenging (I'm a virgo moon and an E/INFJ), but I can already see why it may be the greatest shift I ever make.


8. Future-self meditations.

The meditations I've been doing have been mostly Dr. Joe Dispenza's and future-self types of practices. You can do these in my Mu Membership. They've been incredibly helpful to visualize and feel into who I want to be as I've been making some big changes and decisions in my life lately.


9. Longboard skateboarding.

Let's be honest, this could be on the list every week, but I actually took a big pause on it since I've been back in California. In a bit of a rut, I decided doing the same thing over and over wouldn't get me out of it. If I wanted fun and lightness, I needed fun and lightness. So I grabbed Sean's longboard off the wall and ripped around on it through a parking lot. We need sh*t like this more than almost anything else. What's your version?


10. Astrology.

This was my original spiritual gateway drug. It was essentially my first language. But for a while I was getting really sick of people blaming their signs for their stuck, old ways and the moon for their behavior. I wanted more accountability out of people and less judgment. To walk the talk, I started slowly pulling myself away from the whereabouts of the planets and just started focusing on myself. The only thing was, I just ended up in self-critical spiral where I took the weight of all humankind and all of the galaxy and put it on myself. It's crazy to believe the stars control you, but isn't it just crazy to believe they don't just a LITTLE? We all (us and the universe) play a part in everything. I'm back to a belief that's always felt really true to me: astrology is 25% of the puzzle. No more, no less.


11. Andalou Naturals Kukui Cocoa Body Butter

This is not sponsored, but it really would be a win-win for me and Andalou if it were. This is my cold weather antidote. The luscious smell to my evening. The deliciously clean ingredients for my body and soul. I just love this shii and if you know me personally, you're probably getting one for Christmas.

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