[A song for this read]
Twenty-six was the birthday I planned to post a picture of my bare butt in the Dominican Republic on Instagram with a caption about how I no longer gave a f*ck and was putting an end to my people pleasing. Instead, I spent the day on an emergency flight from Puerto Rico to Los Angeles to sit beside my ex-fiancé's dad on life support.
Twenty-six was the age I was supposed to be a bride, but instead I ended up getting dumped by my husband-to-be in my parents' living room.
Twenty-six was the year I planned to be my physically fittest, but instead I gained twelve pounds.
Twenty-six was the year I imagined I'd be the most "adult," but instead I moved in with my mom and dad.
Twenty-six was the year I planned to honeymoon in Japan, but instead I couch-surfed with childhood friends.
At twenty-six, I died and was reborn again.
At twenty-six, everything that wasn't meant to be was obliterated.
At twenty-six, everything that was meant to be, became.
At twenty-six, I signed my first deal with a literary agent.
At twenty-six, I learned true unconditional love.
At twenty-six, I bought my first home.
At twenty-six, I remembered that I am luscious.
At twenty-six, I remembered that I am made of golden graphite.
At twenty-six, I put my full faith in my spirit and the universe.
At twenty-six, I started falling in love with my friends in a way I thought I only could with a romantic partner.
At twenty-six, I learned to receive.
At twenty-six, I learned to surrender.
At twenty-six, I became authentically me.
At twenty-six, I thought my dad would be walking me down the aisle, but instead he'll be walking me to the door of my little Hawaiian bungalow.
At twenty-six, I thought my mom would be helping me set up my first nursery, but instead she'll be helping me plant my first garden.
At twenty-six, I thought I'd be celebrating with my one true love, but instead I'll be celebrating with my true loves.
At twenty-six, I thought I'd be wearing a wedding dress, but instead I'm wearing my own real skin.
At twenty-six, I thought I'd be in love with another, but I'm in love with myself.
At twenty-six, I thought I'd be spending months writing thank you cards and I am.
Three more days of twenty-six and I am spending them on my hands and knees, bowing with reverence...
To the year I came alive.